Chuck Norris can pop every kernel in the bag without burning one.
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All men are created equal.
Equally inferior to Chuck Norris.
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Even after muting "Walker, Texas Ranger", you can still hear Chuck Norris's victims screaming after getting roundhouse kicked.
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Chuck Norris can't be racist, because to him there are no people, just light and dark targets.
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There is a plaque laid next to the remnants of the Titanic which reads, "Only Chuck Norris is unsinkable"
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Charlie Sheen can achieve recovery by taking a drug called Chuck Norris.
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When Chuck Norris opens a bottle of coke happiness runs away screaming.
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The Beatles originally sang "All you need is Chuck Norris".
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Dante's Inferno is based on a Nature Walk Chuck Norris once took.
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When Chuck Norris wants salmon he eats the bear too.
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In the beginning there was nothing...then Chuck Norris Roundhouse kicked that nothing in the face and said "Get a job".
That is the story of the universe.
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