Chuck Norris doesn't pay the government, the government pays him.
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Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
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When Chuck Norris plays hide and seek, even google can't find him.
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Chuck Norris can pop scissors with a balloon.
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Chuck Norris has 5 bathtubs, they are known as the Great Lakes.
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Chuck Norris was asked to star in Night of the Living Dead but filming was ended after the zombies were to afraid to be roundhouse kicked in the face.
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The earth is rotating because Chuck Norris is breathing.
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In a fight between Batman and Darth Vader, the winner would be Chuck Norris.
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Someone once tried to tell Chuck Norris that roundhouse kicks aren't the best way to kick someone.
This has been recorded by historians as the worst mistake anyone has ever made.
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Why did we have a global recession?
Because Chuck Norris asked "Whats a global Recession?"
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Chuck Norris does not smile. \r\nHe flexes his teeth.
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