Chuck Norris doesn't pay the government, the government pays him.
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Chuck Norris doesn't bowl strikes, he just knocks down one pin and the other nine faint.
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Do you know why the Earth's spinning ?
Because Chuck Norris is running on it.
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When Chuck Norris steps on a crack he breaks another persons mother's back.
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Chuck Norris' dog is trained to pick up his own poop because Chuck Norris will not take shit from anyone.
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Where does the devil go when he dies?
He goes to Chuck Norris for an eternity of roundhouse kicks.
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The dark side of the moon is the side that cowers in fear of Chuck Norris.
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Some say Chuck once sneezed a rhino inside out.
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Jurrasic Park is a second name for Chuck Norris' backyard.
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Chuck Norris named his parents.
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Chuck Norris dosent swim, water just likes him.
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