Chuck Norris dosn't need a bullet proof vest because the bullets wouldn't dare hit him.
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Chuck Norris cut his scissors using his hair.
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Chick Norris has never pooped because nothing scares the shot out of Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can actually punch you in the soul.
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When Chuck Norris has a heart attack, he attacks back.
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Chuck Norris doesn't hold any world records, he broke them all.
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Chuck Norris once roundhouse kicked a tadpole and turned it into a frog, then he kicked it again and it died.
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Chuck Norris can shoot around a corner.
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The boogie man checks his closet at night for Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris really can get chicken from a tuna can.
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Chuck Norris can literally kill time.
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