Chuck Norris dosn't need a bullet proof vest because the bullets wouldn't dare hit him.
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Fool me once shame on you, fool me twice and Chuck Norris will roundhouse kick me for being stupid.
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Chuck Norris found the fountain of youth, but...he wasn't thirsty.
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Chuck Norris is the most feared predator on the planet.
That's why sharks have a Chuck Norris week.
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Yoda used to be 6 feet tall till he tried that Force crap on Chuck Norris.
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We live in an expanding universe.
All of it is trying to get away from Chuck Norris.
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A group of children once said, "Red rover, red rover, send Chuck Norris over."
Those children were the dinosaurs.
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Mess with Chuck Norris, you get roundhouse kicked.
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The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.
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Chuck Norris took a rocket science class but quit becaus it was too easy.
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When Chuck Norris kills time, that'll be the end of it.
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