Chuck Norris dosn't need a bullet proof vest because the bullets wouldn't dare hit him.
Q: What is the sound of Chuck Norris clapping one hand? A: Thunder.
Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
Santa Claus asks Chuck Norris for presents.
Those who ignore history, are doomed by Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris doesn't battle, he just allows you to lose.
The world did not have a tilt in its axis until Chuck Norris stubbed his toe on the North Pole.
Santa writes to Chuck Norris about what he wants for Christmas.
There is a plaque laid next to the remnants of the Titanic which reads, "Only Chuck Norris is unsinkable"
When Chuck Norris plays hide and seek, even google can't find him.