Justin Beiber screeched like a high-pitched girl the time he saw Chuck Norris.
His voice is still up there today.
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Night time... when Chuck Norris tells the sun it's time for bed.
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Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
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Chuck Norris was the fourth wise man, who gave baby Jesus the gift of beard, which he carried with him until he died.
The other three wise men were enraged by the preference that Jesus showed to Chuck's gift, and arranged to have him written out of the bible.
All three died soon after of mysterious roundhouse-kick related injuries.
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If Chuck Norris were a calendar, every month would be named Chucktober, and every day he'd kick your ass.
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Chuck Norris doesn't wear seatbelts.
Seatbelts wear Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can hit a grand slam with no one on base.
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Chuck Norris flosses with dynamite wick.
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Chuck Norris doesn't age, he levels up!
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Chuck Norris can drive to the moon... on foot.
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Do you know Chuck Norris?
Yes?
Then he shall allow you to live... for now.
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