Chuck Norris doesn't shower, he only takes blood baths.
Chuck Norris won one million dollars gambling playing Solitaire.
They say that "You can't cheat Death", but Chuck Norris can beat it fairly.
The sandman puts other people to sleep but Chuck Norris put the sandman to sleep.
Count from one to ten. That's how long it would take Chuck Norris to kill you... Forty seven times.
Chuck Norris went on Man vs Wild once. The Wild lost.
Chuck Norris kills 100% of germs.
Chuck Norris can drown a fish.
Chuck Norris sent Jesus a birthday card on December 25th and it wasn't Jesus birthday. Jesus was to scared to correct Chuck Norris and to this day December 25th is known as Jesus' birthday.
When Chuck Norris puts toast in the toaster it comes out bread.
Chuck Norris keeps his friends close and his enemies dead.