Chuck Norris can turn on clapper lights by flexing.
Chuck Norris doesn't think he's better than everyone, everyone thinks Chuck Norris is better than them.
Leonardo DiCaprio only starred in Inception because if he didn't, Chuck Norris will enter his dream and roundhouse kick him into limbo.
Chuck Norris used to be a soccer referee. He lost the job after giving penalties to the players: Death Penalty.
Chuck Norris is the most feared predator on the planet. That's why sharks have a Chuck Norris week.
Chuck Norris uses the lethal injection to have a 5min nap.
Chuck Norris once ran on the treadmil. It couldn't keep up.
Leading hand sanitizers claim they can kill 99.9 percent of germs. Chuck Norris can kill 100 percent of whatever he wants.
Chuck Norris can kill a Great White Shark by drowning it.
Chuck Norris had his first job as a paperboy. "There were no survivors."
When Chuck Norris lifts weights, the weights get stronger.