Chuck Norris looks at IEDs and the trigger man blows up.
Chuck Norris can access the internet from a walkie talkie.
Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
Chuck Norris will never die. The Grim Reaper is too scared to come and claim him.
Stevie Wonder was the last person to stare Chuck Norris directly in the eyes...
Chuck Norris helps little old ladies cross the street... Bad guys get kicked to the curb!
The Matrix once had to take the red pill to escape from Chuck Norris. It failed. Nothing can escape from Chuck Norris.
Racehorses have to pee like Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris does not know where you live, but he knows where you will die.
When Chuck Norris tries to kill himself, he always dodges the killing blow 'cause he's that awesome.
15 years ago I started a burping contest with Chuck Norris... who had the longest? I don't know he is still busy.