The reason everything is better in Texas is because Chuck Norris said so.
Chuck Norris updates his DNA every 5 minutes.
People believe in God. God believe in Chuck Norris.
Every 5 seconds, somewhere in the world, someone dies of Chuck Norris.
Facebook wants to add Chuck Norris as a Friend.
Chuck Norris can locate the nowhere.
Chuck Norris was once on Celebrity Wheel of Fortune and was the first to spin. The next 29 minutes of the show consisted of everyone standing around awkwardly, waiting for the wheel to stop.
There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of animals Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris has the greatest Poker-Face of all time. He won the 1983 World Series of Poker, despite holding only a Joker, a Get out of Jail Free Monopoly card, a 2 of clubs, 7 of spades and a green #4 card from the game UNO.
The smoothie was invented when Chuck Norris needed information from a banana.