Joke #9651

The reason everything is better in Texas is because Chuck Norris said so.
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If Chuck Norris were president, he would protect the secret service.
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Chuck norris recently received a restraining order barring him from getting closer then half a mile from Satan.
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Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys. The cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore. The first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out." The second says, " Once I was swimming in a river, and an annocanda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth." Chuck norris just smiles and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
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Chuck Norris is a man of few words. Chuck Norris is not a man of few roundhouse kicks to the face.
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Chuck Norris hit you tomorrow, is going to hit you yesterday, and you're now dead.
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Thomas Edson made a shadow on a paper that Chuck Norris was reading, then Thomas Edson decided to create the electric light.
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Chuck Norris was about to die... until the Grim Reaper phoned in sick.
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The entire movie of "Anaconda" was recorded inside Chuck Norris' pants.
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Chuck Norris doesn't cheat death, he beats it fair and square.
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There are two types of people in the world... people that suck, and Chuck Norris.
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