Chuck Norris once got careless and accidentally locked his drawer key inside his drawer, with a lock that needs the key to lock.
Chuck Norris once challenged Lance Armstrong in a "Who has more testicles?" contest. Chuck Norris won by 5.
Chuck Norris' feminine side is manlier than the manliest man's manly side.
Michael Jackson does moonwalk because he doesn't have time to turn and run away from Chuck Norris.
Some people wear Superman pajamas. Superman wears Chuck Norris pajamas.
Chuck Norris doesn't have a shadow. His shadow isn't stupid enough to follow him around.
Chuck Norris once uppercut a horse and that is how the giraffe was created.
Chuck Norris made Journey stop beleiving.
There is no theory of evolution, just a list of creatures Chuck Norris allows to live.
Chuck Norris is what you get when you open a can of whoop-butt.
Chuck Norris has nicknames for his feet... Hiroshima and Nagasaki.