A mother goes to the market and leaves her lilttle boy in the house.
Meanwhile, she leaves her phone charging on the floor in the house.
Unfortunately, power goes off and there is a message that comes with a sound on the phone.
The message reads, ' battery low'.
Concerned, the little boy picks the phone and puts it on the table and wait for some time waiting to see another message on the phone that should read, 'battery high'.
He was disappointed.
Q: What's red and goes up and down?
A: A tomato in an elevator.
Q: What did the elephant do when he hurt his toe?
A: He called a toe truck.
A woman gets on a bus with her baby.
The bus driver says: ''Ugh, that's the ugliest baby I've ever seen!''
The woman walks to the rear of the bus and sits down, fuming.
She says to a man next to her: ''The driver just insulted me!''
The man says: ''You go up there and tell him off. Go on, I'll hold your monkey for you."
Awwww, kids. They blow up so fast...
Get it, kids grow up so fast.
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Why do bears have fur coats?
(Because they look silly wearing jackets!)
What is the difference between a fridge and a kid?
A fridge doesn't shout when you put your meat inside it.
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Two small boys, not yet old enough to be in school, were overheard talking at the zoo one day.
"My name is Billy.
What's yours?" asked the first boy.
"Tommy," replied the second.
"My Daddy's an accountant.
What does your Daddy do for a living?" asked Billy.
Tommy replied, "My Daddy's a lawyer."
"Honest?" asked Billy.
"No, just the regular kind", replied Tommy.
Handy hint: Feed your baby onions so you can find it in the dark.
A math teacher asks a pupil, what are 3, 5, 7 and 11?
The pupil thinks for a moment and then replies, "On 3 there is cartoon network, on 5 we have cartoon network, on 7 dad checks out news-bulletin and the channel that comes by pressing 11 on the remote is FTV, which my brother watches late at night."
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