The best math jokes

Three elderly men are at the doctor for a memory test. The doctor says to the first man, "What is three times three?" "274," was his reply. The doctor says to the second man, "It's your turn. What is three times three?" "Tuesday," replies the second man. The doctor says to the third man, "Okay, your turn. What's three times three?" "Nine," says the third man. "That's great!" says the doctor. "How did you get that?" "Simple," says the third man. "I subtracted 274 from Tuesday."
Vote: has 67.88 % from 20 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: doctor, math, old people
Teacher asks student: What is the half of 8? Student: Miss horizontally or vertically? Teacher: What do mean? Student: Horizontally it is 0 and vertically it is 3.
Vote: has 67.63 % from 274 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math, student, teacher
Yo mama is so fat that she took geometry at the school because she heard there will be some pi.
Vote: has 67.50 % from 58 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: fat, math, Yo mama
Q: What did one math book say to the other? A: Don't bother me I've got my own problems!
Vote: has 67.31 % from 100 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math
What happened to the plant in math class? It grew square roots.
Vote: has 67.10 % from 75 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math
Q: How do mathematicians induce good behavior in their children? A: "If I've told you n times, I've told you n+1 times..."
Vote: has 66.68 % from 67 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math
Teacher: "Are you good at math?" Pupil: "Yes and no." Teacher: "What do you mean?" Pupil: "Yes, I'm no good at math!"
Vote: has 66.64 % from 42 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math, school, teacher
First Caribou: What kind of math do owls like? Second Caribou: Owlgebra.
Vote: has 66.45 % from 19 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: animal, math
Sex is like math: Add the bed Subtract the clothes Divide the legs and pray you dont multiply
Vote: has 66.43 % from 63 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: dirty, math, time
There was a statistician that drowned crossing a river... It was 3 feet deep on average.
Vote: has 66.43 % from 63 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: math