The best jokes about men

There are 5 birds in a tree. A hunter shoots 2 of them dead. How many birds are left? 2 birds. The other 3 fly away!
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has 47.72 % from 34 votes. More jokes about: men
Why do women pay more attention to their appearance than improving their minds? Because most men are stupid, but few are blind.
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has 47.62 % from 25 votes. More jokes about: men, stupid, women
Why do men chase women they have no intention of marrying? For the same reason dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving.
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has 47.37 % from 18 votes. More jokes about: car, dog, marriage, men, women
One guy says to a bald guy "Your hair ran away to find someone with a brain."
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has 46.87 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: insulting, mean, men, stupid
Something Special For His Birthday It was Jim's birthday, and he was considered to be an "old man" by his friends standards. So, to liven him up a bit, Jim's friends decided to give him something special for his birthday. They bought him a hooker. The call girl, as she preferred to be called, went to his house and knocked on the door. When Jim answered, she said "Hi I'm your birthday present!" Startled, he asked "What am I supposed to do with you?" "I'm yours for super sex," she answers. So Jim replied "Well, I'm 75 years old so I'll have the soup."
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has 46.54 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: men
What is the difference between a man and E.T.? E.T. phoned home.
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has 46.10 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: men
If women knew what men were really thinking, they'd never stop slapping them.
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has 46.10 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: men
Two hunters shot a deer, and were dragging him to the car by the hind leg, which was difficult because the other legs kept snagging in the brush. "Chet, I've got an idea, I think we are doing this wrong. Let's try dragging him by the horns, like we were advised by the ammo-store salesman." "OK," says Ivan. After a while, Ivan says, "I think this is a lot better because his legs fold up and don't get caught in the brush, but we seem to be getting farther from the car."
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has 46.10 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: men
A couple was having an argument, and the man was losing badly. After 5 minutes the woman won the argument proving the man to be stupid, the man sadly says "If my proof falls then I rome through the halls." Then the woman leaves for 10 minutes and comes back starts giving him a blowjob. The man is confused and says "what are you doing?" She said "If I prove you dumb I give ya some." The man continues to lose a argument knowing he will get a blowjob after 10 minutes, and he did. Years later they have a kid but none of them want him so they have an argument of who takes care of it and the other leaves for good. The man without a thought loses the argument the get another blowjob, but after the argument the woman starts rapping "Yo yo guess who's the kid, not me so suck yourself bitch." Before she leaves the he says "what about the blowjob?" She says ask my twin sister that has herpes cause she did it the whole time.
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has 45.89 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: couple, dirty, men, stupid, women
Q: How does a man show he is planning for the future? A: He buys two cases of beer.
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has 45.58 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: beer, men
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