The best jokes about men

Husband: What have you been doing with all the grocery money I gave you? Wife: Turn sideways and look in the mirror.
Vote: has 44.24 % from 10 votes. Send joke:
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Q. Why do men find it difficult to make eye contact? A. Breasts don't have eyes.
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How does a man save a woman from being attacked on the street at night? He controls himself.
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A man rushes out of his wife's hospital room. "Doctor, doctor -- my wife's been in a coma for several months, but when I just touched her left breast, she sighed!" "That's very encouraging," says the doctor. "Go back and touch her right breast. See if she reacts." A few minutes later, the man rushes out again: "Doctor, she moaned!" "Very good," says the doctor. "Now try oral sex. She should certainly react to that!" Five minutes later, the man comes out back out, white as a sheet. "Doctor -- she died." "No! What happened?" the doctor exclaims. "Well, doc," the man says tearfully, "she choked."
Vote: has 43.21 % from 12 votes. Send joke:
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Why is it dangerous to tell the husband to go and change the son? Two hours later he comes back with a baby girl.
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More jokes about: baby, husband, men
Q. Why did the man cross the road? A. He heard the chicken was a slut.
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: animal, men
Why do men need instant replay on TV sports? Because after 30 seconds they forget what happened.
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More jokes about: men, sport, technology, time
A burglar breaks into a house and is quietly and expertly collecting valuables in his bag when he hears a voice: "Jesus is watching you."
Vote: has 42.61 % from 14 votes. Send joke:
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Why do women pay more attention to their appearance than improving their minds? Because most men are stupid, but few are blind.
Vote: has 41.84 % from 22 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: men, stupid, women
Why is it difficult to find men who are sensitive, caring and good-looking? They already have boyfriends.
Vote: has 41.82 % from 24 votes. Send joke:
More jokes about: gay, men, relationship


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