Why do female black widow spiders kill the males after mating?
To stop the snoring before it starts.
Q: What is difference between man and Superman?
A: Man wears underwear under the trouser and superman wears it over the trouser.
Jose approaches the Mexican border on his bicycle.
Hanging from his shoulders he has two large, bulky bags.
The border patrol guard stops him and says,"Hey mister what ya got in those bags?"
"Just sand," replied Jose.
One day a man and a giraffe go to a pub they have a couple of drinks then on their way out the giraffe falls over and blocks the door the bar.
Man says "you can leave that lion here."
The man said "it's not a lion its a giraffe you idiot."
Q: Why is it jewish men won't go down on a woman?
A: Too close to the gas chamber.
I’ve know John a long time and am considered a bit of a father figure to him.
I have watched him crawl around on his knees, drink from a bottle and I’ve cleaned up after him but enough about the Bachelor Party.
Men are like buses.
One comes every 15 minutes.
Why did the blonde have a sore belly button?
Because there are blonde men too!
"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something."
Why are men like blenders?
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.