Q: What is difference between man and Superman?
A: Man wears underwear under the trouser and superman wears it over the trouser.
One day a man and a giraffe go to a pub they have a couple of drinks then on their way out the giraffe falls over and blocks the door the bar.
Man says "you can leave that lion here."
The man said "it's not a lion its a giraffe you idiot."
A couple was having an argument, and the man was losing badly.
After 5 minutes the woman won the argument proving the man to be stupid, the man sadly says
"If my proof falls then I rome through the halls."
Then the woman leaves for 10 minutes and comes back starts giving him a blowjob.
The man is confused and says "what are you doing?"
She said "If I prove you dumb I give ya some."
The man continues to lose a argument knowing he will get a blowjob after 10 minutes, and he did.
Years later they have a kid but none of them want him so they have an argument of who takes care of it and the other leaves for good.
The man without a thought loses the argument the get another blowjob, but after the argument the woman starts rapping
"Yo yo guess who's the kid, not me so suck yourself bitch."
Before she leaves the he says "what about the blowjob?"
She says ask my twin sister that has herpes cause she did it the whole time.
I’ve know John a long time and am considered a bit of a father figure to him.
I have watched him crawl around on his knees, drink from a bottle and I’ve cleaned up after him but enough about the Bachelor Party.
Men are like buses.
One comes every 15 minutes.
Q: Why is it jewish men won't go down on a woman?
A: Too close to the gas chamber.
Why did the blonde have a sore belly button?
Because there are blonde men too!
"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something."
Why are men like blenders?
You need one, but you're not quite sure why.
How are men like diplomas?
You spend lots of time getting one, but once you
have it, you don't know what to do with it.