I can honestly say in all our years of friendship, I have never heard anyone question John’s intelligence, to be perfectly honest I never heard anyone even mention any intelligence on John’s part.
How are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, they emit noxious odors, and half the time they don't work.
Men are like.....Weather. Nothing can be done to change either one of them.
What is gross stupidity? 144 men in one room.
What does a man consider a seven course meal? A hot dog and a six pack.
Women dream of world peace, a safe environment, and eliminating hunger. What do men dream of? Being stuck in an elevator with the Doublemint twins.
How do you know if your man is dead? The sex is the same, but there's less ironing.
What's the best way to force a man to do sit-ups? Put the remote control between his toes.
"Wise men talk because they have something to say; fools talk because they have to say something."
A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mail box. She opened it, slammed it shut, and stormed back in the house. A little later she came out of her house and again went to the mail box and again opened it, then slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, “Is something wrong?” To which she replied, “There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps giving me a message saying, “YOU’VE GOT MAIL!”