What do you call a woman that works like a man??
Lazy.
Did you hear about the man who got a vasectomy at Sears?
Now every time he gets excited, the garage door goes up.
Men come in three sizes:
Small, medium, and OOoohhh yesss!
Definition of a man with manners – he gets out of the bath to pee.
Ladies and Gentlemen, if there is anybody here who is feeling, worried, nervous or apprehensive it is probably because you just married John.
How do you know if a man is lying?
His lips are moving!
How do most men compare to Mel Gibson?
They have everything he has, except talent, money, and looks.
What's the difference between a man and a messy room?
You can straighten up a messy room.
Q: How can you tell when a man is dead?
A: He stays stiff for more than two minutes.
What did God say after creating man?
I can do so much better.