Ladies and Gentlemen, if there is anybody here who is feeling, worried, nervous or apprehensive it is probably because you just married John.
How do you know if a man is lying? His lips are moving!
How do most men compare to Mel Gibson? They have everything he has, except talent, money, and looks.
What's the difference between a man and a messy room? You can straighten up a messy room.
Q: How can you tell when a man is dead? A: He stays stiff for more than two minutes.
What did God say after creating man? I can do so much better.
How was Colonel Sanders a typical male? All he cared about were legs, breasts, and thighs.
Why do jocks play on artificial turf? To keep them from grazing.
How do you save a man from drowning? Take your foot off his head.
Why don't women blink during foreplay? They don't have time.