A man was in his front yard mowing grass when his attractive blonde female neighbor came out of the house and went straight to the mail box. She opened it, slammed it shut, and stormed back in the house. A little later she came out of her house and again went to the mail box and again opened it, then slammed it shut again. Angrily, back into the house she went. As the man was getting ready to edge the lawn, here she came out again, marched to the mail box, opened it and then slammed it closed harder than ever. Puzzled by her actions the man asked her, “Is something wrong?” To which she replied, “There certainly is! My stupid computer keeps giving me a message saying, “YOU’VE GOT MAIL!”
How do you know if a man is lying? His lips are moving!
How do most men compare to Mel Gibson? They have everything he has, except talent, money, and looks.
One spelling mistake can destroy your life! A husband wrote a message to his wife on his official trip and forgot to add 'e' at the end of a word: "I am having such a wonderful time! Wish you were her..!"
How many men does it take to screw in a light bulb? ONE......He just holds it up there and waits for the world to revolve around him.
How does a man show he's planning for the future? He buys two cases of beer instead of one.
What do most men consider a gourmet restaurant? Any place without a drive-up window.
How are men like chocolates? A.They never last long enough B.They always leave stains whenever they get hot.
Confucius say, man who fart in church sit in own pew.
Mattel is coming out with a talking Barbie. They say it was easy to get Barbie to talk. The problem was getting Ken to listen.