The best money jokes

Q: If marriage is terrific what is divorce? A: Ten thousand!
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has 39.50 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: divorce, marriage, money
Yo mama so stupid when she pays her bills she gives pennies to her cash.
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has 39.50 % from 19 votes. More jokes about: money, stupid, Yo mama
A couple was having a discussion about what to see and do now that they were safely in Florida on their honeymoon. Trying to assert himself rite off the bat, he exploded, "If it weren't for my money, we wouldn't be here at all!" The wife replied, "My dear, if it weren't for your money, not only would we not be in Florida, we wouldn't on a honeymoon, nor would there be any "we" in the first place."
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has 39.47 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: holiday, money, wife
A journey of a thousand miles begins with a cash advance.
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has 39.47 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: money
I’ve just come into some money. I wonder if they’ll still accept it at the shop?
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has 39.47 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: money
Why’s a fat woman like a skateboard? They’re both fun to ride, but you wouldn’t want your friends to see you on one.
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has 39.47 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: money
The town’s local council remarks that the best lawyer in town never made a donation to charity tendency. To convince him, the mayor calls him in his office: Sir, I remarked that you’re revenue reached a number of $600.000. With all these, you never made a donation to the charity... If you looked into my files, did you also remark that my mother is sick, and the medicaments she needs exceed her funds? No... answers mayor. In second place, my brother, war veteran, is condemned in a wheelchair and he’s blind. The mayor started apologizing, but was interrupted: And more, my sister died into a car accident and left tree children orphans. Stunned, the mayor says: I didn’t know, please accept my apologies... But the lawyer continues: I don’t see why I should give you any money, if I don’t ever give them money...
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has 39.32 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: health, kids, lawyer, money
An Iraqi goes to the bank to get his salary from a French Company. The Saudi manager of the bank asks him to sign on the back of the check. "That's humiliation," shouts the Iraqi, "why should the French sign on the front and I sign on the back. I want my money NOW!" The Saudi refuse to pay him and the Iraqi keeps shouting in the bank then the American high manager comes with a 5kg hammer and knocks the Iraqi on the head. After 5 minutes the Iraqi wakes up, signs the back of the check and gets his money. The Saudi clerk goes to the Iraqi and asks, "Tell me why you didn't sign the check the first time but signed it later on?" The Iraqi said, "You missed the point, you just told it to me, but the American explained it."
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has 39.32 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: money
Being poor has its advantages. For example your keys are never in your other trousers.
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has 39.32 % from 13 votes. More jokes about: money
A couple was having a discussion about what to see and do now that they were safely in Florida on their honeymoon. Trying to assert himself rite off the bat, he exploded, "If it weren't for my money, we wouldn't be here at all!" The wife replied, "My dear, if it weren't for your money, not only would we not be in Florida, we wouldn't on a honeymoon, nor would there be any "we" in the first place."
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has 39.32 % from 15 votes. More jokes about: money, travel
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