How do you know when a blonde has a brain fart? Her ears flap.
What's the difference between a leprechaun and gonorrhea? One's a cunning runt.
Yo mama so fat that her knuckles have sideburns.
A man with pain on his right knee consulted his doctor. Doctor said: "It is nothing to worry about. It is due to old age." Patient: "The left knee is of the same age. But how is it that leg does not pain?"
Q: Why is diarrhea hereditary? A: It runs in your genes.
Q: What is the worst thing about a vegetable? A: Spitting them back up in a wheelchair.
What do sick cannibals have for breakfast? Vitamin bills!
Yo mama is so dumb she stuck a battery up her butt and said, "I got energy!"
Chuck Norris brings his fists to gunfights.
If you are next to Chuck Norris then you will always have perfect cell phone reception.