Q: What's the difference between a dead skunk lying in the road and a dead lawyer lying in the road?
A: There are skid marks in front of the skunk.
The schoolteacher was taking her first golfing lesson.
"Is the word spelt p-u-t or p-u-t-t?" she asked the instructor.
"P-u-t-t is correct," he replied.
"Put means to place a thing where you want it.
Putt means merely a vain attempt to do the same thing."
Q: What do you call 50 blacks at the bottom of the ocean?
A: A good start.
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The housewife answered a knock on the door and found a total stranger standing on the doorstep.
"Excuse me for disturbing you, ma'am," he said politely, "but I pass your house every morning on my way to work, and I've noticed that every day you appear to be hitting your son on the head with a loaf of bread."
"That's right."
"Every day you hit him on the head with a loaf of bread, and yet this morning you were beating him with a chocolate cake."
"Well, today is his birthday."
Why are little girls better than little boys?
Because when you're finished using them as little girls, you can turn them over and use them as little boys.
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Q: What u call 10 black people in the back of a truck?
A: A good days hunting.
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Always go to other people’s funerals, or they won’t go to yours.
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Why did Hitler go to the eye doctor?
Because he can Nazi.
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Q: Why did the Avon lady walk funny?
A: Her lipstick.
In World War 2 Chuck Norris Pointed his Fingers at an enemy zero and said BANG, The plane burst into flames and crashed.
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