On his birthday, Chuck Norris randomly selects one lucky child to be thrown into the sun.
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When Death knocked on Chuck Norris’s door, Chuck Norris laughed.
Death is now Chuck Norris’s B*tch.
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You know why Chuck Norris is always on top during sex?
Because he never fucks up.
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Chuck Norris can peel an orange with his eyelids, but he rarely needs Vitamin C.
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The only reason Osama Bin Laden is dead is because they finally let Chuck Norris into Pakistan...
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The pouch respects Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris is danger's middle name.
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Chuck Norris can skip a track on a cassette.
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Chuck Norris named his parents.
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You can't win a starring contest with Chuck Norris becuase when you look in to his eyes you see hell starring right back at you.
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Chuck Norris originally appeared in the "Street Fighter II" video game, but was removed by Beta Testers because every button caused him to do a roundhouse kick. When asked bout this "glitch," Norris replied, "That's no glitch."
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