Q: What do you call cheese that's not yours? A: Nacho cheese!;)
What's worse than a male chauvinistic pig? A women who won't do what she's told.
Your momma's like a shotgun 2 cocks and shes ready to blow.
Bigfoot thinks Chuck Norris is a myth
Yo momma so slutty when she got a new mini skirt, everyone commented on her nice belt.
Yo Mama's teeth are so spaced out it looks like her tongue is in jail.
Q: What do Darren Millane (Collingwood footballer killed in a recent car crash) and a blonde have in common? A: Put either of 'em in a car and they're fucked.
Late one night a couple is driving down a country highway and run over an oppossum. Knowing that mother oppossums often carry babies in their pouch, they decide to check out this poor animal. Sure enough there was a baby, so they decide to rescue it. They take it into the car and continue down the road. The little oppossum is scared and squirming around like crazy so the wife asks her husband what she should do? He thinks for a minute and says, " Well it's used to being in it's mother's pouch. Maybe if you unbutton your jeans, and put it in "there" it will calm down." She exclaims, " I'm not going to do that! That thing is smelly and nasty!" The husband replies," Well, why don't you just hold it's little nose!"
The smoothie was invented when Chuck Norris needed information from a banana.
‘He had ambitions at one time to become a sex maniac, but he failed his practical.’ Les Dawson