Chuck Norris once raced light. He is still waiting for it to catch up.
Chuck Norris has his own protien powder. The ingriedients include: cocoa powder, stem cells, dodo egg protien, enriched uranium, LSD, and Vin Diesel.
Charlie Sheen is a drug, it will melt your face and kill you. Chuck Norris had two 8-Balls of Sheen and is now suing for false advertising.
Racehorses have to pee like Chuck Norris.
Did you know Chuck Norris's tears was the curernto Cansa, but the problem was he never ever cried.
What does a blonde see when she looks into a box of cheerios? Donut Seeds.
Yo mamma so ugly that her birth certificate came with an apology letter from the condom factory.
Chucks Norris's mirror is scared to look at him.
Patient: "Doctor, I have to ask a personal question, if you don’t mind. Why do you charge fees much lower than other doctors?" Doctor: "You see, I am not a M.B.B.S. I am only a B.Sc."
A friend of mine often tells to his wife: "It is better to be loved and almost the only one rather than to be the only one and almost loved…"