Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
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What do gays call hemorrhoids ?
Speed bumps.
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Q:What's the most dangerous job in America?
A: The graveyard shift at a KFC in the projects.
Q: What do gay horses eat?
A: Hay.
Whats the difference between a pizza and a jew?
A pizza doesn't scream when you put it in the oven.
A young boy enters a barber shop and the barber whispers to his customer, “This is the dumbest kid in the world.
Watch while I prove it to you.”
The barber puts a dollar bill in one hand and two quarters in the other, then calls the boy over and asks, “Which do you want, son?”
The boy takes the quarters and leaves. “What did I tell you?” said the barber.
“That kid never learns!” Later, when the customer leaves, he sees the same young boy coming out of the ice cream store.
“Hey, son! May I ask you a question?
Why did you take the quarters instead of the dollar bill?”
The boy licked his cone and replied, “Because the day I take the dollar, the game is over!”
Yo mama is so fat she got on a scale and it said: One person at a time please!
The Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse actually live in Chuck Norris's nutsack.
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Donald Trump and Vladimir Putin are having dinner.
Trump orders a steak, and Putin orders the roast duck.
The waiter, however, gets their plates mixed up.
Trump does not wait, but rather just starts digging in.
"Wow," Putin says. "Your hands make my duck look bigger."
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Chuck Norris's e-mail adress is Yahoo@ChuckNorris.com
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