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Did you hear about the blonde who went to a library and checked out a book called How to Hug? She got it home and found it was volume seven of the encyclopaedia.
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Why did the dinosaur have so few friends? Because Tyrannosaurus reeks!
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What do you call a dinosaur with magic powers? Tyrannosaurus Hex.
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What happens when you put the batteries in BACKWARDS in the Energizer Bunny? He keeps coming and coming and coming...
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Twenty feet below sea level, a diver notices another guy at the same depth with no scuba gear. The diver goes down another 10 feet, and the guy joins him a minute later. The diver goes below 15 more feet, and a minute later, the same guy joins him. The diver takes out a waterproof pad and pencil and writes, "How are you able to stay this deep without equipment?" The guy takes the pencil and pad and writes, "I'm drowning, you moron!"
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If you want to know why men are called the 'opposite sex', express an opinion!
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Law of Pill Rejection Any pill given to a cat has the potential energy to reach escape velocity.
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So...I had this rabbit that died of heatstroke after a week and I didn't have a time to name it. So after it died and was on my lap the name came to me...I'll call it floppy!
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Why are husbands like lawn mowers? They're hard to get started, emit foul odors, and don't work half time.
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Why did the Irishman give up internet shopping? The trolley kept falling off the computer.
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More jokes about: IT