Jesus walks into a hotel, rings the bell, and waits for the receptionist to come out.
He looks her dead in the eye, slams three nails on the counter, and says, "Can you put me up for the night?"
Chuck Norris doesn't play computer games,the computer plays Chuck Norris games.
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Chuck Norris' tears would save lives, if he'd cry.
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Chuck Norris doesn't pay the government, the government pays him.
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Q: What's brown and taps on the window?
A: A baby in a microwave!
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Chuck Norris created the platypus by roundhouse kicking a duck at a beaver.
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A honeymoon couple go into a hotel and ask for a suite.
‘Bridal?’ asks the desk clerk.
‘No thanks,’ replies the bride, ‘I’ll just hang onto his shoulders.’
Why did the blonde have a sore belly button?
Because there are blonde men too!
I have a scary joke about math but im 2² to say it.
Chuck Norris' personal airplane is called Air Force Chuck.
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