Q: How do you blindfold a Gook?
A: You use dental floss.
‘He had ambitions at one time to become a sex maniac, but he failed his practical.’
Les Dawson
Yo momma's so fat and old when God said, "Let there be light," he asked your mother to move out of the way.
I was in Tesco's and I saw this man and woman wrapped in a barcode.
I said, "Are you two an item?"
I went down the local supermarket, I said, ''I want to make a complaint, this vinegar's got lumps in it'', he said, "Those are pickled onions'
I live like a medieval knight.
Every night I go to sleep with a battleaxe at my side.
Yo momma’s so fat, when the family wants to watch home movies they ask her to wear white.
Wife to husband: ‘You certainly made a fool of yourself last night.
I just hope nobody realised you were sober.’
‘Why don’t you go home to your wife.
Better yet, I’ll go home to your wife and, outside of the improvement, she won’t notice any difference.’ Groucho Marx