Yo momma’s so fat, when the family wants to watch home movies they ask her to wear white.
Wife to husband: ‘You certainly made a fool of yourself last night.
I just hope nobody realised you were sober.’
‘Why don’t you go home to your wife.
Better yet, I’ll go home to your wife and, outside of the improvement, she won’t notice any difference.’ Groucho Marx
How many computer programmers does it take to change a light bulb?
Are you kidding?
That’s a hardware problem!
Question: What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a pit bull?
Answer: Lipstick.
The Golfer asked his Caddy, "Hey boy, do you think it is a sin to play golf on Sunday?
Caddy replied, "The way you play, Sir, its a crime any day of the week!"
When Chuck Norris is as old as dirt, he will be the salt of the earth.
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How far can you spit.
Try to beat Chuck Norris if you ask how far can he spit, at night look at the moon and don't wonder from were the craters come.
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Would a Police-Dog arrest itself for fouling the street?
Police Dog Joke Submitted by Kabogga.
Chuck Norris doesn't play computer games,the computer plays Chuck Norris games.
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