Best jokes ever

"Yo momma so fat she was baptized in the ocean!"
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has 31.06 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: fat, insulting, Yo mama
Q: What did the big turnip say to the little turnip A: When did you turn up?
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has 31.06 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: kids
Q: Where does your nose go, when it gets hungry? A: Booger King!!!
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has 31.06 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: kids
What goes ‘choo choo choo’ while online? Thomas the search engine.
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has 31.06 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: IT
A guy sees a classified ad that says "Will give Blow Job while singing the Star Spangled Banner at the same time." The guys thinks to himself that it sounds interesting and unbelievable, and so decides to pay her a visit. She lets him in and says that the lights have to be off. So she turns the light off and starts sucking his dick. All of a sudden he hears the Star Spangled Banner, clear as day. He really wants to know how she is doing this so he flips on the lights. All he sees on the floor is a glass eye.
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has 31.06 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, music
Boy Monster: Did you get the big red heart I sent you for Valentine's? Girl Monster: Yes, I did. Thank you. Boy Monster: Is it still beating?
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has 31.06 % from 21 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, Valentines day
"Now, class, closely observe the worms," said the teacher while putting a worm into the water. The worm in the water writhed about, happy as a worm in water could be. He then put the second worm into the whiskey. It curled up and writhed about painfully, then quickly sank to the bottom, dead as a doornail. "Now, what lesson can we learn from this experiment?" he asked. Johnny, who naturally sits in back, raised his hand and wisely, responded confidently, "Drink whisky and you won't get worms."
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has 31.03 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, death
Three women were sitting in a bar, (burnette, redhead, and a blonde) they were all pregnant. The burnette says, "I know what I'm going to have." The other to asked how. She replied, "Well I was on top when I concieved so I will have a baby boy". The red head said, "If your logic is correct then I will have a baby girl because I was on the bottom when I concieved. The blonde starts crying and orders another shot and starts screaming, "PUPPIES, PUPPIES!".
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has 31.03 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: alcohol, baby, bar, blonde, ginger
Question: What’s the difference between a woman with PMS and a pit bull? Answer: Lipstick.
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has 31.03 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal, women
There was an old man named Bill, and one of the things he most enjoyed was playing golf with his old buddy Fred. Bill's wife always commented on how happy he looked after a game. But one day he came home from their weekly game looking terrible and very tired. His wife asked, "What's the matter, Bill? You always seem so happy after golf and you look miserable right now." Bill said, "Well, something terrible happened. Fred had a heart attack on the first hole." "My God, honey!" said the wife, rushing to comfort him. "That must've been terrible!" "It was," he said. "All day long it was: hit the ball, drag Fred to the ball, and then hit it again..."
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has 31.03 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: game, god, golf, sport, wife
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