Why did Hitler committed a suicide? He received the bill from Gazprom.
He used to be a bottle baby, but when he reached the age of ten he pushed the cork out and escaped.
How do you know when an Asian breaks into your home? Your house is clean, your computer is fixed, and their still pulling out of your driveway.
Chuck Norris and Jean-Claude Van Damme play tug a war with live annacondas.
We love Facebook but we hate the face of book.
Donald Trump is a vain, arrogant, hateful pig. That's why Americans voted him in - he's just like them.
How do you kill half of Ethiopia? Throw a piece of bread off a cliff. How do you kill the other half? Tell them it still has not been eaten.
What’s the difference between a nigger and a pizza? Pizza doesn’t scream in the roaster!
"My son, this is your senior year at school so your mom and I decided that you’re going to be a doctor." "But what are you saying dad? You know very well that I’m not in a position even to... kill a mosquito."
The last time Chuck Norris was hungry, all the dinosaurs suddenly got extinct...