Q: What's the hardest thing about a sex change from a man to a woman? A: Inserting the anchovies
Jesus won't come back again. Why? Because he know you will kill him and see if he will wake up again.
Chuck Norris fills a 1-Liter Bottle With 2 liters of water.
Two brothers enlisting in the Army were getting their physicals. During the inspection, the doctor was surprised to discover that both of them possessed incredibly long, oversized penises. "How do you account for this?" he asked the brothers. "It's hereditary, sir," the older one replied. "I see," said the doctor, writing in his file. "Your father's the reason for your elongated penises?" "No sir, our mother." "Your mother? You idiot, women don't have penises!" "I know, sir," replied the recruit, "but she only had one arm, and when it came to getting us out of the bathtub, she had to manage as best as she could."
Teacher: “How do you spell “dog”?” Boy: “D, o, g, enter.”
Why did Hitler committed a suicide? He received the bill from Gazprom.
He used to be a bottle baby, but when he reached the age of ten he pushed the cork out and escaped.
How do you know when an Asian breaks into your home? Your house is clean, your computer is fixed, and their still pulling out of your driveway.
We love Facebook but we hate the face of book.
Tom to Dick: ‘My mother made me a homosexual.’ Dick: ‘If I bought her enough wool would she make me one as well?’