The husband who wants a happy marriage should learn to keep his mouth shut and his chequebook open.
Your file was so big.
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.
I got really love sick the other day working away from home.
Went to the doctors and they said it was chlamydia.
Johnny collected lots of money from trick or treating and he went to the candy store to buy some chocolate.
"You should give that money to charity", said the shopkeeper.
"No, I'll buy the chocolate.
YOU give the money to charity!"
A blonde walks into an appliance store and says I would like to buy that T.V. please.
The store clerk replies Im sorry, we dont do business with blondes.
So she stormed off back to her house and dyed her hair black.
The next day, she went back to the same store and said I would like to buy that T.V. please.
The store clerk, once again, replies Sorry, we dont do business with blondes.
The blonde replied How did you know I was blonde?
The clerk says Because thats a microwave, not a T.V.
Q. Why is a blonde like railroad tracks?
A. Because she's been laid all over the country.
Q: How can you tell when a lawyer is lying?
A: His lips are moving
Q: Why won't they hire a blonde pharmacist?
A: They keep breaking the prescription bottles in the typewriters.
I went to the doctors the other day and I said, 'Have you got anything for wind?'
So he gave me a kite.
Q. What is the definition of gross ignorance?
A. 144 blondes.