Best jokes ever

The web isn’t better than sex, but sliced bread is in serious trouble.
has 20.85 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: IT
What does Michael Jackson call a Tickle-Me-Elmo doll? Bait!
has 20.85 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: disgusting, music
Two bums are sitting talking. The first one starts bragging, "Today was the best day ever! This morning I found a brand new pack of smokes just sitting on the ground. So you know what I did? I sat and smoked every fucking one of them... had the best day ever." The second bum just laughs, "That's nothing, today I was walking along the rail road tracks and I found this girl laying on the tracks. You know what I did? I fucked her all day long." The other bum interrupts, "Bull! You didn't do it all day long did you?", the other continues, "Well, no but it was for at least a few good hours, best day of my life." The first bums asks, "So did she give you a good blowjob?" The other replies no. "How could you possibly be getting busy with this girl for hours, and she doesn't even give you a blow job?" To which the other replies, "How could she? She didn't have a head!"
has 20.80 % from 239 votes. More jokes about: black humor, blonde, death, sex
There once was a girl named Pinkie who desired to have a little inky, when the notion of the motion was planted, in her dinky little head. With her butt in the air, while the man in the sidecar tattooed her derriere 100 miles per hour down I 45 to bike fest. Drunk and stupid and would not listen, smeared beyond recognition, she said it was Tinker Bell but we couldn't tell O well.
has 20.65 % from 46 votes. More jokes about: dirty, driving, drunk, poems, stupid
What do you call a black person thats light? Michal jackson
has 20.61 % from 62 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist
Q: How do u know a black person has been in your house? A: Everything has gone.
has 20.60 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist
Johny was stopped by the policeman on the road, the policeman has looked over the whole car and has said to Johny: "Johny, if you´ll go somebody by your car, the human would probably survive the collision with your car also without your help, but the treatment with the content of your archaic first aid box will survive nobody, there´s no doubt. Did you buy it in the shop B.C.?"
has 20.60 % from 58 votes. More jokes about: car, cop, little Johnny, time
A tourist was drowning in the sea: Help! Help! He screams. Very calm the fisherman says: Press F1 already and stop screaming. You’re scaring the fishes away.
has 20.57 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: fish, IT
"But my elderly aunt was considered a highly respectable spinster!" the society matron protested. "Can't you find some way to cover up the shocking fact that she died in bed while being simultaneously serviced by two paid studs???" "You just leave it to me, Mrs. Van Horn," soothed the police officer. "I'll just put it in my report that she died at the stroke of two."
has 20.57 % from 27 votes. More jokes about: cop
What does a blind, deaf, quadriplegic baby can get for Christmas ? Cancer.
has 20.48 % from 125 votes. More jokes about: baby, Christmas, disgusting, health
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