Q: Do you know what happends with a nigger if he sticks up 12 varningssigns in his ass?
A: He becomes a toblerone!
Vote:
I was taken short in the back of a taxi.
Because of all the mess I gave the driver a ten-pound note.
Mind you it had only been a fiver before I wiped myself with it.
Who was the last person to box Rocky Marciano?
His undertaker.
Golf
He’s in debt up to his eyes.
The only thing he’s paid for is his hat.
Why is basketball such a messy sport?
Because you dribble on the floor!
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water?
He set a new lap record.
What's black and white and green?
A frog sitting on a newspaper.
A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink.
After a few more he needs to go to the can.
He doesn't want anyone to steal his drink so he puts a sign on it saying, "I spat in this beer, do not drink!".
After a few minutes he returns and there is another sign next to his beer saying, "So did I!"
Why did the frog cross the road?
Some mean little kid super-glued it to the chicken.
Q. Why were men given larger brains than dogs?
A. So they wouldn't hump women's legs at cocktail parties.