Q: Whats the difference between Amy Winehouse and Captain Morgan?
A: Captain Morgan comes alive when you add coke!
What does a blonde in a supermarket bending over?
Looking for low prices!
If a fifty cent piece and a quarter were on the Empire State Building, which would jump off first?
The quarter, because it has less sense (cents).
A blonde went to an appliance store sale and found a bargain.
"I would like to buy this TV," she told the salesman.
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
She hurried home and dyed her hair, then came back and again told the salesman, "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
"Darn, he recognized me," she thought.
She went for a complete disguise this time: a brown curly wig, big baggy clothes, and big sunglasses.
Then she waited a few days before she approached the salesman again and said, "I would like to buy this TV."
"Sorry, we don't sell to blondes," he replied.
Frustrated, she exclaimed, "How do you know I'm a blonde?"
"Because that's a microwave," he replied.
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What does the informatics teacher scream when he’s drowning? - F1, F1, F1...
A blond whines at her mother:
Mother, I’m impregnate!
What?
Where the hell was you’re head?
What do you mean by that, on the pillow off course!
Beer is proof that God loves us and wants us to be happy. Benjamin Franklin.
Did you hear about the blonde who sold her car to get some money for petrol?
Harry’s so cheap, he didn’t buy his wife a pearl necklace, he got her a length of string and told her to start a collection.
How did the live baby escape from a room filled with with zombie babies?
He ate his way out.
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