A man walked into a branch of the Antelope Valley Bank and handed a teller a note demanding money.
The man had one hand in his pocket, as if holding a gun, so the teller began handing over the contents of her cash drawer.
When she had forked over $7,000 the robber said, "That's enough" and walked out the door.
It's hard to find a bank robber who knows when he's had enough.
How can you tell soap operas are fictional?
In real life, men aren't affectionate out of bed.
What does a blonde in a supermarket bending over?
Looking for low prices!
The wages of sin are death – but after taxes and NI contributions you’ll just end up feeling a bit tired.
Your file was so big.
It might be very useful.
But now it is gone.
Why did the football coach flood the pitch?
Because he wanted to bring on the sub!
Q. What's five miles long and has an IQ of forty?
A. A blonde parade.
What's gray and powdery?
Instant Elephant.
A guy walks into a bar and orders a drink.
After a few more he needs to go to the can.
He doesn't want anyone to steal his drink so he puts a sign on it saying,
"I spat in this beer, do not drink!".
After a few minutes he returns and there is another sign next to his beer saying, "So did I!"