Best jokes ever

A lady went to see a tarot reader woman who'll predict her future: Lady, I'm sorry to inform you that your husband will die in the near future. Don't tell me things that I already know, tell me if there would be an investigation!
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The reason Tom Cruise runs in all his movies is because he's running the hell away from Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris has 10 custom classes on Modern Warfare 2, and hes never prestiged.
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Q: If Dan Quayle, Bob Packwood and Bill Clinton participated in a spelling contest, who would win? A: Dan Quayle. He's the only one who knows that "harass" is one word.
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Q: What do you get when you cross a perm with a rabbit? A: Curly hare.
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Yo' Mama is so fat, her stair master has a dinner tray attached.
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What did Cinderella Dolphin where to the ball? Glass flippers.
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What did the baby dolphin do when he didn't get his way? He whale-d.
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Chuck norris can eat chicken tonight tomorow.
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More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, food
When Chuck Norris donates blood, he gives twenty gallons. None of it is his own.
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