Chuck Norris is so hard, he uses diamonds as stress balls.
Vote:
Chuck Norris only created Russians so he can use them to take over TGI Fridays.
Vote:
Yo momma is so hairy when she lifts her armpit up it looks like she's got Bigfoot in a headlock.
Yo mama is so old she was electrocuted with steam.
There was a Packers fan with a really crappy seat at Lambeau.
Looking with his binoculars, he spotted an empty seat on the 50-yard line.
Thinking to himself "what a waste" he made his way down to the empty seat.
When he arrived at the seat, he asked the man sitting next to it, "Is this seat taken?"
The man replied, "This was my wife's seat. She passed away. She was a big Packers fan."
The other man replied,"I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. May I ask why you didn't give the ticket to a friend or a relative?"
The man replied, "They're all at the funeral."
Why doesn't Osama bin Laden have sex with his five wives?
Because every time he spreads their legs he sees Bush.
Q: How can you tell if your girlfriend really likes you?
A: If you stick your hand in her pants and it feels like you're feeding a horse.
Vote:
Q: What do men and garbage bags have in common?
A: Black are bigger than white.
Vote:
Joke has 59.79 % from 127 votes. More jokes about: black people, dirty, insulting, racist, white people
There were two security guards who worked on opposite shifts, but looked after the same building.
Over a period of a year, the night shift security guard noticed that his opposite was putting on weight.
So one evening at shift change, the night shift security guard says to the day shift security guard "Hey buddy, you aint half gettin fat".
To which the day shift guard replies "Yeah, that's because every time I shag your wife she gives me a chocolate biscuit".
Chuck Norris can scratch sandpaper.
Vote: