What two members of the cow family go everywhere with you?
Your calves.
I hear you take milk baths.
That's right.
Why?
I can't find a cow tall enough for a shower.
"Did you hear about the farmer who lost control of his tractor in the cow pasture?"
"No."
"Did he hurt the cows?"
"No, he just grazed them."
What happens when the cows refuse to be milked?
Udder chaos.
If Chuck Norris fights with himself, it's a win-win situation.
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Q: What do Captain Kirk and toilet paper have in common?
A: They both wipe out klingons.
Q: Why did the referee stop the leper hockey game?
A: There was a face-off in the corner.
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Willy Wonka gave an everlasting gobstopper to Chuck Norris.
The flavor lasted 2.3 seconds.
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Men call us birds, is that because of all the worms we pick up?
Chuck Norris' beard has a tattoo.
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