There was a boy watching tv with his parents.
A sex scene comes on.
The boy asks what the people are doing.
The mom said "they were just making a cake."
The boy goes"oh yea, I saw u and daddy making a cake yesterday and I Licked up all the icing."
Chuck Norris once spelled the entire alphabet using only M&Ms.
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Q: Where does a snowman keep his money?
A: In a snow bank.
Q: What is the difference between a gay guy and a fridge?
A: The fridge doesn't fart when you take out the meat.
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My 1st time having sex. I suddenly stopped and didn't move.
She: "What are you doing?"
Me: "I've seen this on YouPorn, it's called Buffering.
The young fellow is about to marry and asks his grandfather how often a married couple should have sex.
His grandfather tells him, "When you first get married, you want it all the time, maybe several times a day; later on, maybe once a week. As you get older, you have sex maybe once a month. When you get really old, you are lucky to have it once a year, maybe on your anniversary."
The young fellow asks, "How about you and Grandma?"
His grandfather replies, "Oh, we just have oral sex now. She goes into her bedroom and I go into my bedroom. She yells, 'F**k you,' and I holler back, 'F**k you, too!'"
Q: What do you call an Asian family tree?
A: A rice bush.
What does a gay man and an ambulance have in common?
They both get loaded from the rear and go whoo-whoo!
What do you call a clairvoyant midget who escaped from prison?
A small medium at large.
A midget is riding a bus when a blonde steps on him.
“Hey you, brunette, watch where you're going,” yells the midget.
The blonde looks down and says, “I am not a brunette, I am a blonde.”
The midget replies, “Not from where I'm standing.”