Yo mama so fat and poor the only thing she could afford to eat was grease.
Q: What did the blonde do when she couldn't afford a personalized license plate? A: She changed her name to JKM345.
Women are Angels. And when someone breaks our wings, we simply continue to fly... On a broomstick. We're flexible like that.
Yo mama so fat that she could use a bra as a parachute
Leonardo DiCaprio only starred in Inception because if he didn't, Chuck Norris will enter his dream and roundhouse kick him into limbo.
What do you call an incestuous nephew? An aunt-eater.
An Aggie and a Longhorn had just bought a ranch together, so they were driving the fence line to check everything out when they came upon a goat with his head stuck in a fence. So the Longhorn gets out of the truck, looks around, and then starts screwing the goat. He gets finished, takes a step back, ands asks the Aggie, "Hey, you want a piece of this?" The Aggie says, ´"Yeah, but do I have to stick my head in the fence?"
My New Years resolution is 1080p.
Yo mama so fat, when she went to a subway she mistook the train for a sandwich and ate it.
Teens are at an awkward stage in their lives. They know how to make phone calls they just don't know how to end them.