Best jokes ever

Little Johnny was at school one day when the teacher asked the kids if they could use the word definitely in a sentence. Well the first little girl raised her hand and said, "Well the trees are definitely green." The teacher said "No not really because the trees turn yellow red and brown in the fall." The next little boy raised his hand and said, "The sky is definitely blue." The teacher said, "No not really because the sky can be all different colors." From the back of the room little Johnny raised his hand and asked, "Do farts have lumps?" The teacher said, "No Johnny of course not, that’s silly." Then Johnny said, "Well then I definitely shit my pants!"
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has 56.25 % from 106 votes. More jokes about: fart, kids, little Johnny, school, teacher
Little Johnny had finished his summer vacation and gone back to school. Two days later his teacher phoned his mother to tell her that he was misbehaving. “Wait a minute,” she said. “I had Johnny with me for three months and I never called you once when he misbehaved.”
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has 56.24 % from 173 votes. More jokes about: little Johnny, phone, school, teacher
Only if they had more mosquito nets in Africa. We would be able to save millions of mosquitos from dying horribly from HIV.
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has 56.22 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist
Two sperms. The first one asked the second "How much time we need to reach the womb?" The second one answered "To much time left... We are in the stomach now."
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has 56.22 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: dirty, disgusting, sex, time
Chuck Norris once stitched up a cut in his arm with a spoon.
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has 56.22 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: Chuck Norris
Q: What do you call a white person engulfed in flames? A: A firecracker.
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has 56.22 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: racist
Q: Whats the difference between a black person and an apple? A: The apple falls from the tree.
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has 56.22 % from 47 votes. More jokes about: black people, racist
A woman went to the doctor's and complained of being really sore. "Do you have any idea why?" "Well, I had sex with an elephant!" "You did? But elephants are known to have small penises!" "Yeah, but he fingered me first."
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has 56.20 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: animal, doctor, elephant, sex
Q: Why do Soviet soldiers always miss? A: They have terrible Marxmanship.
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has 56.20 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: ethnic, management, war
What concert costs only 45 cents? 50cent featuring Nickelback.
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has 56.20 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: music
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