Chuck Norris can't be in a 3D movie because the entire room would feel his roundhouse kicks.
Ozzy Ozbourne once bit the head off a bat. Not one to be outdone, Chuck Norris bit the head off Batman!
You know Chuck Norris' pet lizard, right? Last I heard, he was in the movie "Godzilla". Oh, and his pet turtle starred in "Gamera" as well.
When somebody else yawns, Chuck Norris does not.
They say, "You can't fight city hall", but Chuck Norris can. It's not much of a fight....
Chuck Norris is the real man inside of Chucky.
Chuck Norris can set water on fire. He can also set fire on water.
When Chuck Norris was a kid he didn't play with Lincoln Logs, he built real houses.
Before each filming of Walker: Texas Ranger, Chuck Norris is injected with fourteen times the lethal dose of elephant tranquilzer. This is, of course, to limit his strength and mobility, in an attempt to lower the fatality rate of the actors he fights.
Chuck Norris fires Donald Trump.
If it looks like chicken tastes like chicken and smells like chicken and Chuck Norris says it's beef then it's beef.