Best jokes ever

Q: What are the blonde's first words after 4 years of college? A: "Would you like fries with that?"
Vote: has 54.46 % from 60 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: blonde, college, communication, food
How do you get a Jewish girl's number? You pull up her sleeve.
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More jokes about: jewish, racist
How can you tell if a blonde is having a bad day? Her tampon is behind her ear and she can’t find her pencil.
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More jokes about: sex
Why are all jokes about women one-liners? So men can understand them.
Vote: has 54.45 % from 50 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: insulting, men, women
I think you’ll find that any of my lady companions will tell you I’m a ‘five times a night man’. I really shouldn’t drink so much tea before I go to bed.
Vote: has 54.44 % from 55 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: sex
Man comes home from work to find his boyfriend whacking off into a condom. Man says, "WTF?" Boyfriend says, "I am making you a sack lunch!"
Vote: has 54.38 % from 189 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: gay, relationship
A Polish man moved to the USA and married an American girl. Although his English was far from perfect, and they got along very well. One day he rushed into a lawyer’s office and asked him if he could arrange a divorce for him. The lawyer said that getting a divorce would depend on the circumstances, and asked him the following questions: "Have you any grounds?" "Yes, an acre and half and nice little home." "No, I mean what is the foundation of this case?" "It made of concrete." "I don’t think you understand. Does either of you have a real grudge?" "No, we have carport, and not need one." "I mean. What are your relations like?" "All my relations still in Poland." "Is there any infidelity in your marriage?" "We have hi-fidelity stereo and good DVD player." "Does your wife beat you up?" "No, I always up before her." "Is your wife a nagger?" "No, she white." "Why do you want this divorce?" "She going to kill me." "What makes you think that?" "I got proof." "What kind of proof?" "She going to poison me. She buy a bottle at drugstore and put on shelf in bathroom." "I can read, and it say: 'Polish Remover.'"
Vote: has 54.33 % from 137 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: black people, divorce, lawyer, marriage, wife
Chuck Norris can divide prime numbers into whole numbers.
Vote: has 54.31 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: Chuck Norris, math
Q: Why have scientists started using lawyers for experiments instead of rats? A: They don't become so attached to the lawyers.
Vote: has 54.31 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: lawyer, science
Golfer: "I'd move heaven & earth to break 100 on this course." Caddy: "Try heaven; you've already moved most of the earth."
Vote: has 54.31 % from 32 votes. Send joke:

More jokes about: golf, heaven, sport