Man: When I bend my arm like this it hurts? Doctor: Well, stop doing it!
When Chuck crosses the street, the cars have to look both ways.
Q: How is Yo' Mama like the New York Jets? A: You give them a quarter, and they'll let you score.
Chuck Norris uses live piranhas as bath toys.
Q: What do you call an empty jar of Cheez Whiz? A: Cheez Whuz.
Yo' Mama is so ugly, she can only grow hair on her nuts.
Yo momma so fat it's not even funny anymore.
Yo mamma so stupid she puts a piece of paper on the TV and says, "I'm watching paper-view."
Yo mama so old her social security number is 3!
Three little boys were sitting around talking about their fathers. The first boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings." The second boy said, "My dad can blow smoke rings out of his nose." The third boy said, "Well, my dad can blow smoke rings out of his butt." The first and second boys where amazed. The second boy said, "Have you seen him do it?" "No," said the third boy, "but I've seen the tobacco stains on his underwear."