Chuck Norris can bend light with a roundhouse kick.
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When Chuck Norris watches TV it changes the channel for him when he asks just out of fear.
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Cocaine is Addicted to Chuck Norris.
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Chuck Norris can sink a hole in none!
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Why is it difficult to identify horses from the back?
They re always switching their tails.
What did the cannibal say when he was full?
I couldn't eat another mortal.
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Did you hear about the hopeless athlete?
He ran a bath and came in second.
Q: Why was the man arrested for looking at sets of dentures in a dentist's window?
A: Because it was against the law to pick your teeth in public.
Chuck Norris doesn't chew gum.
Chuck Norris chews tin foil.
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This executive was interviewing a nervous young blonde women for a position in his company.
He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked, “If you could have a conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?”
The blonde quickly responded, “The living one.”