Q: Why do mother kangaroos hate rainy days? A: Because then the children have to play inside.
Chuck Norris can do push-ups in a sit-up position.
Q: How many lightbulbs does it take to change a lightbulb? A: Depends on how clumsy you are.
A man goes to the doctor. "Doctor, that medicine you gave me isn't working. Is there anything else I could try?". "Fill out this tax form," suggests the doctor. "How's that going to help me?", asks the man. "I'm not sure," replies the doctor, "but some of my patients say it gives them relief."
Yo mama so ugly when she smiles her face hurts.
Chuck Norris is the four horsemen of the apocalypse!
This executive was interviewing a nervous young blonde women for a position in his company. He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked, “If you could have a conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?” The blonde quickly responded, “The living one.”
If I wanted some comeback, I'd wipe it off your chin!
Yo momma so fat she thought planet earth was her stomach.
Q: Whats worse then finding half a worm in your apple? A: The Holocaust.