Yo mama so fat even Donald Trump can't make as big of a wall as her.
Yo mama so ugly when she smiles her face hurts.
This executive was interviewing a nervous young blonde women for a position in his company.
He wanted to find out something about her personality so he asked, “If you could have a conversation with someone, living or dead, who would it be?”
The blonde quickly responded, “The living one.”
A large construction company sent a party in charge of finding workers all over the world in the very rural areas.
They sucessfully obtained a dozen men and decided to fly them back to the construction site immidately.
The men were very excited and could only speak of doin the job.
Suddenly the piolot flying the plane encountered some difficulties and very safely landed the plane in the desert.
Unknowingly to the men they thought they reached on the site, so they opened the door and all they could see was sand all around.
Then one of the men shouted out in fear, "Let`s get the f**k out of here before the cement comes."
Chuck Norris Doesn't breakdance.
He breaks dance
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Q: Why doesn't Tigger have any friends?
A: He plays with Pooh.
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A couple who drove their car to K-Mart only to have their car breakdown in the parking lot.
The man told his wife to carry on with the shopping while he fixed the car.
The wife returned later to see a small group of people near the car.
On closer inspection she saw a pair of male legs protruding from under the chassis.
Although the man was in shorts, his lack of underpants turned private parts into glaringly public ones.
Unable to stand the embarrassment she dutifully stepped forward and tucked everything back into place.
On regaining her feet she looked across the hood and found herself staring at her husband who was standing idly by.
The mechanic, however, had to have three stitches in his head.
People say "bless you" when you sneeze because Chuck Norris might catch your soul.
It's a myth.
Chuck Norris can take your soul whenever he wants.
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When Chuck Norris was a kid he taught his parents to stay away from strangers.
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If Chuck Norris roundhouse kicks you, even Google won't be able to find you.
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