He: So then, what's your sign? She: Dollar.
At a recent computer expo (COMDEX), Bill Gates reportedly compared the computer industry with the auto industry and stated: "If GM had kept up with technology like the computer industry has, we would all be driving twenty-five dollar cars that got 1000 mi/gal." Recently General Motors addressed this comment by releasing the statement: "Yes, but would you want your car to crash twice a day?"
Jesus walks into a hotel, rings the bell, and waits for the receptionist to come out. He looks her dead in the eye, slams three nails on the counter, and says, "Can you put me up for the night?"
Chuck Norris Watches "the Nat.Geo. Specials" on Discovery Channel.
Why did the moron give the sleepy cow a hammer? He wanted her to hit the hay!
What do reindeer say before telling you a joke? This one will sleigh you.
Why is a reindeer like a gossip? Because they are both tail bearers.
Why doesn't Sweden export it's cattle? It wants to keep it's Stockholm!
What's a rabbits favorite TV show? Hoppy Days.
A man hires a taxi to take him to court for his bankruptcy trial. When they arrive he says to the driver, ‘Well, I suppose you might as well come in too.’