Yo mama so fat when her beeper goes off, people thought she was backing up.
Q: How can you tell a blonde's been using the computer?
A: There's white-out all over the screen.
Money is not everything.
There’s also MasterCard and Visa.
Q: Did you hear about the annoying midget who went to a nudist colony?
A: He kept getting in everyone's hair.
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Wonder Woman's magic Lasso is actually one of Chuck Norris' chest hairs.
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Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise!
Chuck Norris keyboard doesn't need a delete button.
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Yo mama is so ugly she reminds me SUN, is hard to look at her.
A guy walks into a store.
He goes up to the clerk and holds up his hand.
In his hand he's holding a big pile of crap.
He looks at the clerk with the biggest expression of relief and says, "Whew, that was close. Look what I almost stepped in."
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A waitress walks up to a man to take his order.
"I'd like to get the turtle soup, please."
The waitress walks off to go get his order, but the man changes his mind and decides he wants the pea soup instead.
"Hold the turtle, make it pea!"
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