A waitress walks up to a man to take his order.
"I'd like to get the turtle soup, please."
The waitress walks off to go get his order, but the man changes his mind and decides he wants the pea soup instead.
"Hold the turtle, make it pea!"
Vote:
Chuck Norris speaks english, french, spanish, italian and portuguese.
At the same time in every sentence.
Vote:
At a rally John McCain was asked if he wore boxers or briefs.
He replied, "Depends."
Vote:
Q: How does a blonde order a root beer?
A: Extra large, hold the roots.
They put one man on the moon.
Why can’t they put them all there?
Yo' mama so fat, when she was a baby, she took a bath with a rubber albatross.
Yo mama's so fat, she's got more chins than a Hong Kong phonebook.
Yo' Mama is so fat, people use her butt cheeks for a ski slope.
Yo momma so fat people jog around her for exercise!
Why did the moron give the sleepy cow a hammer?
He wanted her to hit the hay!