"Mom, where do tampons go?"
"Where the babies come from, darling."
"In a stork?
Question: What do women and Slinkies have in common?
Answer: Not really too much, but you can’t help but crack a smile when one tumbles down the stairs.
Chuck Norris does not have to answer the phone.
His beard picks up the incoming electrical impulses and translates them into audible sound.
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What do you call a blonde between two brunettes?
A mental block.
Chuck Norris' Facebook status has a dislike button...nobody clicks it.
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Jamaica has named Usain Bolt its Sportsman of the Year.
In related news, the island has also made Michael Phelps an honorary citizen.
Why should you only put 239 beans in bean soup?
Cuz one more will make it "too farty!"
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A woman goes into an antique shop and says to the owner, "when I was in here last week I saw a big mug with a flat head that holds a lot of beer. I’d like to buy it."
"Sorry," replied the owner, "but I can’t sell you that."
"Why not" asked the customer?
"Because that’s my husband."
The father with his daughter are taking a walk to a public place of their town;
"Ann! Why are you so nervously looking around?" observes the father.
"How else can I find you a really good son in law, dad?"
Barbwire wants a tatoo of Chuck Norris.
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