The best animal jokes

It takes a master to shoot a fly from a hundred Paces, but it takes a Chuck Norris to roundhouse-kick one from a thousand.
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has 41.84 % from 22 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, death
Chuck Norris can make a turtle go faster.
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has 41.83 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, travel
What’s orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot.
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has 41.83 % from 26 votes. More jokes about: animal, parrot
A farmer was bragging. "I've got 350 sheep." "That's a lot of sheep," said another farmer. "And I've got 500 chickens," bragged the farmer. "That's a lot of chickens," answered the second farmer. "And 40 bulls," added the farmer. The other farmer replied, "Boy! That IS a lot of bull."
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has 41.82 % from 24 votes. More jokes about: animal
Q: Why don't black kids play in sand boxs? A: Because they are affraid the cats will try to cover them up.
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has 41.62 % from 185 votes. More jokes about: animal, racist
Well, a man was driving down a country road, and he decided to get out and get some fresh air. He got out, and started walking in a meadow. As he walked, he came upon a hole. Wanting to see how deep it was, he threw a pebble down. No sound. So he threw a medium-sized rock down. No sound. The man started to get frustrated, so he threw a boulder down. No sound. As he searched about, he spotted a railroad beam. He hauled it over to the hole, and shoved it in. No sound. He sat down on the ground, exhausted. Suddenly, he saw a goat running at him, full speed. He leaped up, and it brushed past him, and fell in the hole. He listened, but there was no sound. He sat down again. A few minutes later, a farmer came walking up. The man asked him, "How deep is this hole?" The farmer said, "Oh. Thats the bottomless pit. It never ends. Say, have you seen my prize goat?" The man, not wanting to get the blame, said, "No." The farmer said, "Oh well. He can't get far. He was tied to a railroad beam."
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has 40.95 % from 7 votes. More jokes about: animal
What kind of car does a rabbit drive? A furrari.
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has 40.93 % from 39 votes. More jokes about: animal, car
Chuck Norris once won the Iditarod by pulling his team of dogs on the sled.
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has 40.88 % from 54 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, sport
Chuck Norris was sitting around a campfire with two cowboys. The cowboys were competing to see which one is more hardcore. The first one says," Once, I was charged by an angry bull. I proceeded to jump on its back and kill it by gorging its eyes out." The second says, " Once I was swimming in a river, and an annocanda tried to strangle me. I ripped its head off with my teeth." Chuck norris just smiles and continues tending to the campfire with his penis.
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has 40.77 % from 65 votes. More jokes about: animal, Chuck Norris, cowboy, death
I went to the zoo the other day, there was only one dog in it, it was a shitzu.
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has 40.67 % from 35 votes. More jokes about: animal
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