The best animal jokes

Q. What's black and white and green? A. A frog sitting on a newspaper.
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has 17.55 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
So...I had this rabbit that died of heatstroke after a week and I didn't have a time to name it. So after it died and was on my lap the name came to me...I'll call it floppy!
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has 17.55 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
Why couldn't the skunk use her phone? It was out of odor!
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has 17.55 % from 11 votes. More jokes about: animal
Three retirees, each with a hearing loss, were having a conversation one fine Sunday evening. One remarked to the other, ‘I got a new hearing device and it works fine?' The second said, ‘oh yes, my grandchildren just love the gifts of my choice.' The third one who noticed the hearing device in the ear of the first one asked, what kind is it?' The one with the brand new hearing device answered ‘about 6 O'clock'. All three of them looked up in the birds in the sky and said, "Birds of the same feather ‘flock' together."
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has 17.45 % from 23 votes. More jokes about: animal, bird, kids, old people, time
How do you make a cat be a dog? Pour gasoline on it and light it with a match. It will go 'WOOF.'
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has 16.94 % from 28 votes. More jokes about: animal, cat, dog
Me: Hey look its Nemo! Worker: Sir, that's a clown fish. Me: Bitch, that's a Nemo!
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has 16.33 % from 29 votes. More jokes about: animal, fish
What do you get if you cross a teddy bear with a pig? (A teddy boar!)
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has 16.16 % from 16 votes. More jokes about: animal
"Yes, ma'am," the old salt confided to the inquisitive lady, "I fell over the side of the ship, and a shark he come along and grabbed me by the leg." "Merciful providence!" his hearer gasped. "And what did you do?" "Let 'im 'ave the leg, o' course, ma'am. I never argues with sharks."
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has 16.16 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal
Name an animal that lives in Lapland? A reindeer Good, now name another. Another reindeer!
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has 16.16 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal
Did you hear about the cat who drank 5 bowls of water? He set a new lap record.
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has 16.16 % from 8 votes. More jokes about: animal
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